I can totally relate to you! I think every twin out there can understand our coping ways to this pain are very strange compared to what is normally accepted and understood by a “normal” person .
I always like to assume that my twin is always sad about our separation because how we met was very strange but we both could not really understand why we were so strongly bonded.
So when I feel them sad, I don’t judge but instead I go in myself and tell them; I’m here for You, with you, in you, by you and always forever will be! (I have created self coping lamentations). This easily raises my vibrations whether I am aware of it or no. It’s the Least I Could do to help especially in Separation.
I will be honest that most of the time, these lamentations are for me to stay grounded in the connection when I feel him Sad.
I just want them to experience their pain and go through it because you know what? I did Too! I found ways to go through the pain and I am now proud of who I have become. He will be so much more happier with my Maturity but most of all, I am Ready to Embody Unconditional Love from Him.
And you can not know Happiness and Love except if you know the depth of sadness and sorrow. These two go hand in hand.
I have learned a great lesson for me on this twin flame journey about Pain and sadness; I used to just sulk when I felt low or in pain or lonely. I used to just dive into the whole Victim mode and it felt more hopeless. Some of this victim mentality had become part of my personality. It’s sad I know.
Once I started this twin flame journey all my lessons have showed me that the pain does not go away, dissolve or magically disappear – NO! –
This Pain and Sadness has turned into Peace and Bliss by working on it. Imagine a backyard with stones but Each is 2 sided. The painful side or the Beautiful side. You have free will to make your yard look however you like but it affects your happiness, each choice you make.
The Tricky part is that it is easy to have all sides on beauty and happiness Up but you Must have to Turn these stones yourself. Some stones are heavier than others but none of them is stronger than You!
It is up to you to show up early, prepare your mind, save your energy and strength to easily clean up your backyard and the more energy and time you invest in your “happiness accumulation” by turning the stones, the easier life becomes, the more confident you are to turn more stones the more your effortless at it.
Now imagine if all along, all you had to do was turn these stones on the other side to feel happy. Because they are double sided, you were only seeing the side with your past Pains, Problems etc but you can choose to turn the Beautiful side Up!
Challenge is the work involved. Showing up and sweating for the work to achieve Happiness.
Where does my twin come in?
A stranger passing by, they just come to my door and say oh wow you are so beautiful they way you are! We both have the same yard but with different stones turned up! I can show you how to reveal your beauty but you must endure the Hard Work. I will be here every step of the Way! I promise.
They start motivating me to turn more of my stones at my own Pace. No matter how much they wish they could want to help, it is my stones and my pain. I cry, yell, sweat, crawl just turning my stones one by one, day by day.
They sing for me, dance, clap, and appreciate me for doing my own work! The more I do my work the better our relationship and connection becomes. They are always providing water, juice, food and sometimes they motivate me to work late nights and very early in the morning. All this is for Myself!
Now this is the perfect scenario! Normal days of run/chase, we desperately just wanna fix the other. Wondering how many stones the other is turning and how we can intervene. We keep peeping over their fence but they build it higher as we find more ways to climb their higher wall by chasing them.
All you have to do is use all your energy for YOU!
Some of the coping mechanism is projecting our pain to others especially those in the same boat with us. It is easier to fix others than ourselves. Sometimes our pain is so much more bearable on others than seeing it in our own selves.
All your twin wants and needs is for you to feel happy. What if the sadness is actually yours? What if you are avoiding some sort of pain in your life but projecting it on your Twin? What if this is the reason they keep coming back but running? What if they are pointing you at something in you?
This is where I have been so grateful for my twin; they let me be sad and at first I hated it! I thought it was mean that they repelled my pain. I thought they would understand!!!!
But I grew my own courage and crawled out of my own personal bullshit that I had accumulated in my mind, my Life and my view of Life.